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“How often do you bathe, Lily?”
“What? What kind of question is that, Fiona?”
“Let me guess, every dozen days, or so?”
“Well, I… I, try to…”
“And you go to some human bath with barrels?
“What’s wrong with bathing in a barrel?”
“Lilly, this is why you humans have a reputation… No, this won’t do. We’re going to the baths.”

A Human at the Elven Bathhouse

And that is how I ended up here… at the Elizeium Baths, built by Elize Crane, and, apparently, a very popular place to visit… Rocks above…

Wonderful, isn’t it? So much life, so much noise, so much drama! And after much complaining, you’ve got to admit it’s pretty nice now once you got into the water?

Well, it’s not bad, I guess. But there are so many people in here… This place is so much bigger than I expected, it’s like a palace!

It’s bigger than the palace, dear. I think Elize wanted to show her brother up a bit, even the dome of the hot bath that we are sitting in is both wider and taller than the dome in the palace.

All this for a bath? And it wasn’t even that expensive to enter, how does Elize make any money on this?

Ah, you’re thinking like an Elf, I hear, but she doesn’t. This isn’t about making money. Not directly, at least. This is about the good will of the people and to show how fine life is in the Crane district. This is how you attract the skilled artisans to move to the district, how you convince merchants to take their ship on a little detour. It’s easier to go through a hard day’s work if you know you can relax at the baths afterwards.

The palace is a court for the nobles, the baths strewn across the city are the courts of the people.

I don’t see many humans here, are we even welcome?

Yes, of course, everyone is welcome at the baths. I think this is the biggest thing humans and other kin neglect when it comes to elven society, and they miss out on many opportunities by not coming here.

Really? What do you mean? Isn’t this just an indulgence?

No, well yes, it is, but it’s not only frivolity. This is the place to be to move up in society, to find opportunists you could never find out in the wards.

You see, everyone is equal in here. You could sit in a bath with a dock worker on your right and a Trade Prince on your left. This is especially true for the Elizeium, as it has both a direct lift from the Tower Ward and an entrance from the Mid Ward, becoming a meeting place between the wards. And being the biggest bathhouse in the city, it even attracts visitors from the other districts and far outside the city.

As you might have noticed when we walked in, no signs of wealth are allowed once you pass the undressing room. No jewelry, no circle insignias, no personal servants, even no clothes save for simple wraps and towels. This is all to show that, in here, you are just you.

Shows a bit too much of me for my liking…

You’ll get used to that. I got you the whole-year bracelet, so we can go here whenever we like. Hey, maybe we should meet here every early flame before we get to writing, it’s just a knife’s throw from your new place in the artisan sector and I have to take a lift down to the Mid Ward anyway, might as well be the lift straight into the baths.

You want us to bathe every flame? That seem excessive. Just how clean do you need to be?

You are such a human, Lilly. A bath is a wonderful way to wake you up before getting to work. Besides, there is much more than just bathing here. There are plenty of spaces to lounge and chat, both inside and outside, relax in the cushion hall, or maybe sit on the edge of the garden and watch people in the market below. We could have our breakfast here, you know. The food court and fire pits serve delicacies from all around the sea. The theater host plays and lectures every flame, you said you wanted to learn more about elven culture. We could also exercise in the gymnasium or in the atrium. Wrestling is a particularly popular way to build up a sweat before cooling off in the baths. Come on, Lilly, I’ll show you how before we jump into the red pool!

Ha, very funny Fiona… Wait, where are you going? That was a joke, wasn’t it?

Come on, Lily, we’ve got to get anointed first.
Rocks above… •

The Hot Bath in the large dome of the Elizeium bahthhouse

A Beginner’s Guide to the Baths

The Elizeium is located right next to the east spire, on the cliff overlooking the bay. You enter through the Mid Ward Plaza. In the lobby, you pay the fee and pick out a bracelet. Make sure to get one that fits, you don’t want it to end up at the bottom of the pool. The bracelet is numbered and paired with a smaller band that you tie to your clothesbasket when you turn it in to the attendants in the undressing room.

With your bracelet, you also get two small rings, which are used to exchange for drink or food while in the baths. The portions are small, so make sure to buy a few more while in the lobby, as you can’t take any oil with you.

After undressing, you head into the soap room to clean and rinse under the waterfall that runs in through the ceiling—quite a different experience from a barrel, I must say.

Once clean, you enter the grand hall, an immense space lit by the glowing water of the red pool. It also houses four more unheated baths — two red and two clear that are connected to the big pool outside. On the other side of the hall is the tepid bath and the enormous dome with the hot bath. Either side of which is the even hotter steam and dry air room.

The traditional way is to start with the cold baths and work your way up in temperature. But I like to jump straight into the hot bath after the cold waterfall.

Map of the Elizeium Baths Main Floor

Elizeium Baths side view map floorplan

How the Elven Bathhouse Works

A bath of this size is a marvel of engineering.

Furnaces burn constantly under the pools to keep the water warm, and the hot smoke is funneled through a cavity under the marble and through the walls to heat the rooms.

One of the city’s spring water aqueducts runs straight through the building, supplying water to the waterfalls and baths, as well as powering the lift to raise red water from the sea. A constant supply of red water is needed, not only to prevent it from going stale, but the glow subsides after a flame or two after it’s taken out of the sea, as you know if you are used to lighting your home with a pot of red water.

The overflow of red water runs out of the baths and down a channel through the market and the main street of the Mid Ward, providing light to the city.

The Curious Human

You ask, we answer! Send in your questions and we will answer without blushing… too much.

Tarenore Hechterton, Servant of Rafflesia Kerrii, asks: I haven’t really gone outside the Low Ward where I work, and I was wondering, is it appropriate for me, as a human, to wander into the areas higher up in the city?

Hi, Tarenore. The Mid Ward is open to humans, but it has much stricter rules and way more peacekeepers to enforce the law. The guards at the stairs or the lift will turn you away if they think you might be a beggar, troublemaker, or simply for being dirty. Make sure you are presentable and it should be no problem.

There are bath houses on the Low Ward that can help you with this, to get both you and your clothes clean, or even to rent you clean clothes.

Somewhat ironic considering our main article, you might need to have a bath to get to the bath.
The Tower Ward, however, is off limits even to elves who don’t live there, work there, or has a permit (usually only well-off Mid Ward elves). The only way for a human to visit the Tower Ward is with a resident elf as a guide.

Lorin asks: I know that elves get older than us humans, but I have never seen an elf that looks old, how come? What’s their secret?

Hi, Lorin. It’s kind of unfair, isn’t it? Elves do not age past their physical prime and appear to us humans as perpetually in their early twenties and with a physique we would have to work our butts off for. Fiona told me you can estimate the age of an elf by looking into their eyes. She tried to show me the difference between her 3C7 years (559 in human numbers) and Perry, a novice at the printers who happens to be the same age as me, 1N (23), but I can’t see the difference for the life of me.

You were just distracted because you have a crush on young Perry.

Darkness, Fiona, you can’t write that… He’s going to read this…

Well, I just did. It’s my scroll after all.

Sometimes I think you live to embarrass me…

And you haven’t even seen the picture I had the carver make for our first story. I think Perry will like it.

What is that supposed to mean?