Whether you’re an elf aiming for a convincing human role or a human yearning to step into elfish shoes, we’ve got everything you need for a dazzling masquerade or disguise. Elf costumes, human disguises, wigs, body paint, and all manner of tools, we got everything you need for your totally legal theatrical endeavors.
For legitimate legal theatrical uses only! We do not sell to swindlers, tricksters, forgers, frauds, thieves, burglars, assassins, con artists, scoundrels, scalawags, or other rapscallions. We can’t even imagine the level of mischief they could get up to with our top-quality tools and disguises.
Elf to Human
All you need for when planning a job… I mean, a play as a human.
Human Wigs
With ear compartments to conceal elf ears. Available in many common styles from “hardly washed tangle” to “well, it’s not too terrible”.
Human Aroma
Genuine essence of unbathed human musk, scraped directly from the source. Careful, a little goes a long way. A splash on a rag could also be used to knock someone out. Not that you would do that, of course.
The Ultimate Disguise
The all-in-one human kit. Easy to use and foolproof (as in, it only fools fools).
Basic Human Padding
Elves tend to look skinny in human disguise, which works fine playing a starving Low-Warder. But healthy humans are a bit more “generous”, so you might need to stuff padding in your doublet to soften up some areas of your figure.
Blow-up Human Suit
Quickly change your entire silhouette with this all-in-one body padding. Individually adjustable areas—the more you blow, the bigger it gets. Wont fool anyone with your clothes off, luckily humans are shy by nature.
Human Anatomy
To pull off a convincing human costume, it’s essential to have a good grasp of the differences between human and elven anatomy.
Miscellaneous Disguises, Tools, and Elf Costumes
Deceptive Body Paint
Do you need to fool your mark… I mean, are you staging a play and can’t find the right actors? Not to worry, with our deceptive body paint you can look like anyone.*
*Well, obviously it won’t make you grow horns or more arms, you will still look more or less like you, just with a different color. See our specialty kits for advanced modifications. Don’t forget the paint remover!
Why is there no Amber paint?
Amber Elves have transparent skin, which is impossible to replicate with paint. Don’t even try, you will look like a fool.
The classic
A simple disguise perfect for the masquerade. Not for use in a robbery.
Specialty kit: Fiend
Fiends are difficult to mimic. The horns are the easy part, the hooves take some practice to walk in and the tail is best hidden under cloths. It’s easier, of course, if you are an elf who kept their tail.
Warning: Do not get caught in the Ash Crypt pretending to be a fiend. Consequences will never be the same.
Marionette mask (with small horns)
The Marionettes already wear a mask, so that part is easy. Replicating their jerky movements is the hard part. Tip: Paint subtle lines on your skin to replicate the grain of their wooden bodies.
Pocket pick
Get in everywhere… I mean, did you lock yourself out of your room again? Silly you. With this tool you hardly need a key.
Gordon key
The universal opener. For opening crates backstage, obviously, not for breaking down doors.
Human to Elf
Are you a human looking to play a role as an elf? We got what you need for your elf costume.
Soap
Step one: Take a bath.
Wig & Paint Kit
Crimson and Lerna are good beginner roles for humans, you might not even need the paint for the latter.
Books: Acting Elf
Looking the part is only half the cake. To be convincing you must also know how to behave and speak like an elf.
Gymnasium Pass
Did you think this would be easy? Humans and elves have a similar body type, but when was the last time you saw a soft elf? Even without trying, their basic physique is rather toned compared to a human.
Elf Ear Extenders
Strap on for extra length. Make sure to practice your ear wiggles.
Silver Steel Razor
As elves grow no hair below their neck, human body hair is a dead giveaway. Of course, how much you need to shave depends on how deep undercover… I mean, how committed you are to the role.
We should also mention that the razor is only for shaving, even if it could cut throats with amazing ease. Obviously, as an upstanding citizen you wouldn’t even think about such.
Lily and Fiona Under Cover
Fiona: Oh, Lily! There you are. Or I should say… How do you do fellow human?
Lily: What in the darkness are you up to now?
Fiona: We are printing a pamphlet about theater supplies, and I got some samples.
Lily: So, you painted yourself…
Fiona: Now it’s your turn to be the elf!
Lily: Me?
Fiona: Damn, these sack pants keep sliding down… Have humans invented belts, or would it be more authentic to use a rope?
Lily: Wait, those are my pants!
Fiona: Why don’t you get that off so I can shave and paint the rest of you. Oh, and I need that vest-shirt thing.
Lily: Now, hold on a minute!
